Wednesday, March 21, 2012


When I started this blog, my intent was to publish entries from the journal I began nearly nine months after my multiple myeloma diagnosis.  It has been an interesting and sometimes challenging mission.  Many times, I have found it quite troubling to reflect upon certain stages of this difficult part of my life.   Unexpectedly, there have been times in this project when I have been pleasantly reminded that the inner strength that I didn’t know I had has been much more powerful than I could ever have imagined.  I know from reading other blogs of multiple myeloma patients that I am not alone in this. Revisiting my journal and editing it for publication have been  cathartic experiences that have brought clarity into the life that has become my new reality.  As my blog title implies, I have been compelled to find this clarity.  

It makes me sad when I read of other patients relapsing after battling so hard, but I know that is an aspect of the multiple myeloma world that we all face.  Right now, I am in remission but I know that sometime in the future I, too, will relapse.   It is comforting to know that there are many new drugs in the pipeline for multiple myeloma and that two new drugs are on schedule to be approved in 2012 in the United States.  

When I was undergoing my stem cell transplant, one of my physician’s assistants told my husband and me to remember that all the longevity estimates for MM patients are based on history and to keep in mind that with the advances being made, treatments are becoming more effective in dealing with the disease.  Those were reassuring words and I have thought about them many times.  

In an earlier post, I mentioned a seminar  I had the good fortune to attend in Seattle at Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center moderated by Andrew Schorr of Patient Power.  This seminar featured William Bensinger, MD, Director, Autologous Marrow Transplants at Seattle Cancer Care Alliance and Noopur Raje, MD, Director, Center for Multiple Myeloma at Massachusetts General Hospital.  Here is a link to a video of the seminar:

I am including it again because I think it is important and may provide encouragement to my fellow multiple myeloma patients and readers.  My husband, daughter and I came away from this seminar feeling  heartened and we were filled with hope for the future.

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