Thursday, January 3, 2013

Sunrise



  The grand show is eternal.  It is always sunrise somewhere: the dew is never dried all at once; a shower is forever falling; vapor is ever rising.  Eternal sunrise, eternal dawn and gloaming, on sea and continents and islands, each in its turn as the round earth rolls.
                                                                                  John Muir 

Throughout my life I have always loved sunrise and considered it the most inspiring part of the day.  Even as a teenager in high school, I used to get up early enough to watch the sunrise from our living room window. There was a heater right near where I sat and it kept me warm and toasty as I awaited the first vestiges of color and light.  Some days, it would be overcast and rainy and the beautiful show was hidden from view.  It didn't matter, though, because I knew the grand show is eternal and the sunrise was there even if I couldn't see it and each day I would have a new chance to see the splendor of sunrise.  On those  days when I was graced with a glimpse of the rising sun and surrounding beauty, I felt happy and at peace.  I remember thinking that as the colors of sunrise intensified it was like a crescendo in a symphony building to a climax and then ebbing away.  For me, sunrise symbolized a fresh start and a day full of possibilities.

 At sunrise everything is luminous 
                          but not clear.                                              
                                                  Norman Maclean

The beginning of each new year is much like a sunrise. It is just the early hours of 2013 and the light and color are only starting to appear.  As with every sunrise and a new year, I am filled with hope for the days to come and while a new beginning is luminous with what may be, the future is never clear.

After being diagnosed with multiple myeloma, I have approached each new year with hope tempered by trepidation.  Soon after diagnosis, I was told that the average life expectancy was five years, but with my plasma cell pathology it could be less.  It is now three years later and I am feeling well and, hopefully, still in remission.  The shadow of multiple myeloma is always lurking and my lambda light chain is a cause for concern right now. This has not dampened my spirit because I feel that hope is much stronger than trepidation and for me each sunrise and each new year brings hope.

There was never a night or a problem that could
defeat sunrise or hope.
                                                    Bern Williams 

HAPPY NEW YEARMAY 2013 BE A YEAR OF  
HEALING, GOOD HEALTH AND HAPPINESS.

9 comments:

  1. dear carol leigh,

    there is so much to love in this post, i know i will read it again and again. you sound in such good form, such a good place in your fine mind and sweet heart, overflowing with gratitude. it is a process, isn't it, that gradually the power of gratitude exerts it's bountiful magic into our being. it begins to take precedence over lurking worries and we come to the realization that it so nourishing, sustaining and enduring. you were so blessed as a young girl to find such treasures of nature and to look forward to each glimpse of the awesome possibilites of each dawning days.

    when i read your words as they are written in this post and many you have written in other posts, i feel happy for you, and also happy for the inspiration you offer to others.

    i say let the doctors deal with their medical prognostications. they own them, and they feel obliged to keep track of them. but we have to power within ourselve to have our own predictions for our life - how we wish to live, what we chose to be our priorities, how we choose to feel and think. we own those things, and they are what will keep us afloat, taking every chance to consider the possibilities, learn new things, and hold on tight to the dreams we have for US.

    i feel it in my bones, right to the core of my being - 2012, good it is gone - 2013, is going to be FABULOUS. in fact, i BELIEVE it will be fabulous!

    love, xoxo,

    karen, TC

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    1. Dear Karen,
      I can't begin to tell you how encouraging your comments are to me. Before I began this blog, I was quite hesitant because my self-talk had always been, "You could never be a writer." I was well into my adult life when I began to have a wee bit more confidence - not much, but a little - in my writing skills. However, the thought of publishing a blog for anyone to see was daunting. Thank you for your ongoing encouragement to me as a writer and as a cancer patient.

      I, too, believe that 2013 will be fabulous! Happy New Year to you and, again, thank you for your continuous support.

      Love and hugs,
      Carole Leigh

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  2. Happy New Year Carole! I think we're both 3 years and counting? We're winning!!! Cheers to 2013 and dominating Myeloma! Julie from CA

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    1. Three years and counting, Julie! Here's to many more years! Yes, we are winning and dominating Myeloma!
      Have a wonderful year!
      Love,
      Carole Leigh

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  3. I missed the September Swim Across America for SCCA this year, but am holding the intent I will be there this year. And perhaps we will meet if you go to it... but in any case I am joining KS in her statement of intent and affirmation for good health and optimism for 2013 for you and all reading this, aligning with the intent that we who know about MM are not daunted by numbers (esp for caregivers who worry) and see the Highest Light of Healing coming in!

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    1. Hi Sandy,
      I have never been to Swim Across America for SCCA. Have you been there as a participant or spectator? If you are going to be there, let's be sure to make plans to meet up! I would love that.

      Thank you for your about your continued optimism and support.
      Love,
      CL

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  4. Carole Leigh - what a beautiful posting. I love your writing as it always inspires. Thank you for taking the blog plunge so that we could hear/read your thoughts.

    The beginnings of a new year bring us all a sense of a new slate with days yet to be filled. True - there are many unknowns ( always have been and always will be ). To be grateful for each day, each sunrise and sighing with thank yous at each sunset is indeed living in the moments.

    A most blessed New Year!
    Love,
    Lynn

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    1. Lynn,
      It was so good to see you last night at our Alpha Delta Kappa meeting. I appreciate your kind words. Your writing inspires me and sets such a good example to aspire to.

      A most blessed New Year to you!
      Love,
      Carole Leigh

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